Wednesday, September 23, 2015


Apollonius of Tyana Meets a Fat Man

Philostratus, Life of Apollonius of Tyana 5.23 (tr. Christopher P. Jones):
Seeing a fat young man who prided himself on eating more food and drinking more wine than anyone on earth, he said, "Would you be the glutton, by any chance?" "Yes," was the reply, "and I thank the gods that I am." "And what advantage," asked Apollonius, "have you gotten from this ravenousness?" "Admiration and celebrity," was the reply, "for doubtless you have heard of Heracles, and how his dinners were recorded in song no less than his labors." "He was Heracles," said Apollonius, "but what good is there in you, you scum? The only celebrity left for you is to explode."

νεανίαν δὲ ἰδὼν πίονα καὶ φρονοῦντα ἐπὶ τῷ πλεῖστα μὲν ἀνθρώπων ἐσθίειν, πλεῖστον δὲ οἶνον πίνειν "ἀλλ᾿ ἦ σὺ" ἔφη "τυγχάνεις ὢν ὁ γαστριζόμενος;" "καὶ θύω γε" εἶπεν "ὑπὲρ τούτου." "τί οὖν" ἔφη "ἀπολέλαυκας τῆς βορᾶς ταύτης;" "τὸ θαυμάζεσθαί με καὶ ἀποβλέπεσθαι· καὶ γὰρ τὸν Ἡρακλέα ἴσως ἀκούεις, ὡς καὶ τὰ σιτία αὐτοῦ παραπλησίως τοῖς ἄθλοις ᾔδετο." "Ἡρακλέους" ἔφη "ὄντος· σοῦ δὲ τίς, ὦ κάθαρμα, ἀρετή; τὸ γὰρ περίβλεπτον ἐν μόνῳ λείπεταί σοι τῷ ῥαγῆναι."
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