Laudator Temporis Acti

Alexander Shewan, Homeric Games at an Ancient St. Andrews: An Epyllium Edited from a Comparatively Modern Papyrus and Shattered by Means of the Higher Criticism (Edinburgh: J. Thin, 1911), pp. 29, 31 (lines 110-131):

Why, I pray, dost thou stand in a fright, Oh strong-minded Polemūsa? Come, start the game at once, and make trial and see of what avail is the might of the Phosiloi in the sad mélée of a hot match at kriket. For thou didst once sneer at our prowess, saying that we are the victims of miserable old age, and that we have given over everything to our sons. No, by Zingo, who is nowadays supreme and foremost of gods; we boast ourselves far superior to our sons, who are really a wretched, spiritless, utterly inglorious lot. They care not for manly kriket, but prefer to play goff and bridge with weak girls. They are wild about badmintōn, they ride motor-dicycles, they are effeminate wearers of fine kidskins, slackers who pride themselves on their finger-rings of gold and their two-palm-broad collars of linen, and the beauty wherewith Cytherea of the fair headband hath endowed them. Oh if I were but young, and my muscle as sound, as when I used to pile up big scores time and again! Then would I with a good slog send the leathern ball into the great dark gulf of mouldy Tartarus. But come, no more trifling; give me a ball, and let us see to which of us the Olympian will give the glory.

The Greek, pp. 28, 30:

τίπτε μοι ἕστηκας, κρατερόφρων ὦ Πολεμοῦσα,        110
ταρβαλέη; ἀλλ' ἄρχε θοῶς καὶ πειρήτιζε
ὁπποίη Φοσίλων δύναμις πέλετ' ἐν δαῒ λυγρῇ
καυστείρης κρικέτης· πρὶν γὰρ σύ γ' ὀνέιδισας ἡμῖν
ἀλκήν, φᾶσ' ὅτι δὴ δεδμήμεθα γήραϊ λυγρῷ
ἠδ' ὅτι πάνθ' υἱοῖς ἐπιτέτραφθ' ἡμετέροισιν.        115
οὐ μὰ Ζίγγ', ὃς νῦν γε θεῶν ὕπατος καὶ ἄριστος·
ἡμεῖς τοι παίδων μέγ' ἀμείνονες εὐχόμεθ' εἶναι.
οἱ δὲ μάλ' ἀβληχροὶ καὶ ἀκήριοι, ἀκλέες αὔτως·
οὐ κρικέτην φιλέουσ' ἐυήνορα, ἀλλὰ γοφίνδην
συμπαίζειν κούρῃσιν ἀνάλκισιν ἠδὲ γεφύρην,        120
βαδμιντωνομανεῖς, μωτωροδικυκλοκέλητες,
ἁβρεριφοσκυτεσφορανήνορες, αἰνόθρυπτοι.
χρυσέοις δακτυλίοισιν ἀγάλλονται σφετέροισι
καὶ διπαλαίστοισιν περιδειραίοισι λίνοιο,
κάλλεϊ θ' ὅ σφιν ἔδωκεν ἐυστέφανος Κυθέρεια.        125
εἴθ' ὡς ἡβώοιμι βίη δέ μοι ἔμπεδος εἴη
ὡς ὅτ' ἐεικόσια νήεσκον πολλάκι πηγά,
τῷ κε σφαίραν δερματίνην κόψας ἐλάσαιμι
Ταρτάρου ἐς μέγα χάσμα βαθύσκοτον εὐρώεντος.
εἰ δ ̓ ἄγε, μηκέτι νῦν δηθύνῃς, ἀλλὰ πρόες μοι·        130
εἴδομεν ὁπποτέρῳ κεν Ολύμπιος εὖχος ὀρέξῃ.