Laudator Temporis Acti

Teleclides, fragment 1, from his Amphictyonies, preserved chiefly in Athenaeus 6.268a-d (tr. Charles Burton Gulick):

I will, then, tell of the life of old which I provided for mortals.
First, there was peace over all, like water over hands.
The earth produced no terror and no disease; on the other hand, things needful came of their own accord.
Every torrent flowed with wine, barley-cakes strove with wheat-loaves
for men's lips, beseeching that they be swallowed        5
if men loved the whitest. Fishes would come to the house
and bake themselves, then serve themselves on the tables.
A river of broth, whirling hot slices of meat, would flow by the couches;
conduits full of piquant sauces for the meat were close at hand for the asking,
so that there was plenty for moistening a mouthful and swallowing it tender.        10
On dishes there would be honey-cakes all sprinkled with spices,
and roast thrushes served up with milk-cakes were flying into the gullet.
The flat-cakes jostled each other at the jaws and set up a racket,
the slaves would shoot dice with slices of paunch and tid-bits.
Men were fat in those days and every bit mighty giants.        15

λέξω τοίνυν βίον ἐξ ἀρχῆς ὃν ἐγὼ θνητοῖσι παρεῖχον.
εἰρήνη μὲν πρῶτον ἁπάντων ἦν ὥσπερ ὕδωρ κατὰ χειρός.
ἡ γῆ δ᾿ ἔφερ᾿ οὐ δέος οὐδὲ νόσους, ἀλλ᾿ αὐτόματ᾿ ἦν τὰ δέοντα·
οἴνῳ γὰρ ἅπασ᾿ ἔρρει χαράδρα, μᾶζαι δ᾿ ἄρτοις ἐμάχοντο
περὶ τοῖς στόμασιν τῶν ἀνθρώπων ἱκετεύουσαι καταπίνειν,        5
εἴ τι φιλοῖεν, τὰς λευκοτάτας. οἱ δ᾿ ἰχθύες οἴκαδ᾿ ἰόντες
ἐξοπτῶντες σφᾶς αὐτοὺς ἂν παρέκειντ᾿ ἐπὶ ταῖσι τραπέζαις.
ζωμοῦ δ᾿ ἔρρει παρὰ τὰς κλίνας ποταμὸς κρέα θερμὰ κυλίνδων,
ὑποτριμματίων δ᾿ ὀχετοὶ τούτων τοῖς βουλομένοισι παρῆσαν,
ὥστ᾿ ἀφθονία τὴν ἔνθεσιν ἦν ἄρδονθ᾿ ἁπαλὴν καταπίνειν.        10
λεκανίσκαισιν δ᾿ † ἀνάπαιστα † παρῆν ἡδυσματίοις κατάπαστα.
ὀπταὶ δὲ κίχλαι μετ᾿ ἀμητίσκων εἰς τὸν φάρυγ᾿ εἰσεπέτοντο·
τῶν δὲ πλακούντων ὠστιζομένων περὶ τὴν γνάθον ἦν ἀλαλητός.
μήτρας δὲ τόμοις καὶ χναυματίοις οἱ παῖδες ἂν ἠστραγάλιζον.
οἱ δ᾿ ἄνθρωποι πίονες ἦσαν τότε καὶ μέγα χρῆμα γιγάντων.        15

Apparatus from R. Kassel and C. Austin, edd., Poetae Comici Graeci, Vol. VII: Menecrates — Xenophon (Berlin: Walter de Gruyter, 1989), pp. 669-670: See also S. Douglas Olson, Broken Laughter. Select Fragments of Greek Comedy. Edited with Introduction, Commentary, and Translation (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2007), pp. 75-76, 101-103, 427-428.